Oh Hey, It's May

And apparently it's been May for five days (in the U.S.) now.

Huh.

I only have seven more days of classes, and four of those are finals.  Oh.  And I might not have a final on one of those days.

So actually, I only have six more days of school.

Yayayayayayayay!!!!!!!

At my university, they make use do these teacher evaluations.  We had them at community college too, but there they were online and optional.  Here at the grown up school (they serve beer on campus, so this must be a big girl school) they pass them out in class and make us fill them out with pencil.

This is only my second semester here.  My reviews are usually pretty positive.  Like, I'll mention something that bugs me and follow it up with ideas for improvement and something nice to say about the teacher.  That sort of thing.

Not today.

Today I was pissed.

I wasn't even upset when I started my evaluation of the class and teacher.  Honest.  But by the time I finished, my handwriting was a wreck, my hands were shaking, and I was ready to hurt someone.  I was still fuming about it when my dad picked me up at the train station (we only have one car, so it works better that way) and when I got home to mom and fiance.

My chemistry class sucks.

I don't even know how to put a positive spin on this except that it was a learning experience and it made me really evaluate what I'm doing with my life.  Hence, my degree change.

The teacher is a researcher at heart and has so much trouble explaining everything.  The homework is due, but to date we have only gotten one homework assignment graded and handed back to us.  I stopped doing the homework because it doesn't matter apparently.  Oh, and the stuff covered by the homework isn't on the tests, so good luck there.

I studied for my test last Monday for an hour, because that is what I had.  I reviewed everything he told us would be important for this test.  And you know what?  Out of the entire test (which was essay, btw - I normally like essay, but for chemistry??), I think there was one question that was covered by what he told us to study.

I kind of let everyone have it on my review.

I told them it felt like a weed out class (where the curriculum is designed to make the students fail) even though it's a general requirement for all the science degrees at my university.  And then I basically told them to fuck themselves by saying it worked and that I had changed my degree because of it.

Ugh.

Writing this has me worked up again.  Damn.

Well, happy thought time.  Summer, pool, swimming every day, birthday, etc.

Alright, parents have shown up with food.  Time to eat dinner and get ready for another exciting day of things.

Goodnight, dear readers.  Goodnight.

~Meaghan

Tomorrow and Beyond

I've been a bit of a wreck, truth be told my readers.  Granted, today I am more calm about the procedure.

Yesterday though.  Geez.

I think my problem was that I looked up the pain factor for the liver biopsy.  Never do that.  For reals.

Here is what I know:

1. I know I have to be awake for the procedure because if I breathe when they insert the needle, they may puncture my lung.

2. I know I can expect to be very sore for the following week afterwards.

3. I know I'm going to be jacked up on drugs tomorrow before they do the thing.  From what I've been told, I will basically just not care. About anything.  (Which sounds a lot like being invincible or what depression did to me a few years ago.)

4. I know that this will be okay.

5. I know my mom and fiance will be there.

Beyond these things, I do not know really what to expect.

I can't dwell on it though.  Gotta power through.

Besides, I have chemistry homework due on Wed.  Can't let this slow me down.

So let me tell you some of the good and interesting things that have been going on in my life.  Because while this deal with my liver has been a bummer factor, it has not been the only thing.

Trev took me to dinner last night.  We went to Red Robin, the place we've been going to frequently since we started dating back in 2011.  We laughed and had a good time.  After the food, we went to the bookstore to try to figure out where to start for comic books.

I really, really love super hero movies.  I have since I discovered Watchmen back in 2009 and it grew when I was introduced to them by Trev in the start of our relationship.  There's just something so great about having awesome villains and powerful heroes.  Or, like in Watchmen, when the heroes really aren't heroes.  Anyway.  I want to start reading the comics (the only one I've ever read was Watchmen, and that was before the movie came out) because I think it'll be a great way to learn more about the characters I love.  So we went to the bookstore to try to see a good starting place for me.

It was great.

My knitting has been going well.  I finished my first pair of socks for the new year today.  The yarn is called Atom by String Theory Colorworks and it's great - purple, neon green, and grey, separated by strips of black.

I did have to quit my violin lessons again.  With everything going on, I just don't feel I have time for it right now.  I'm kinda sad about it, but I know that eventually I'll be able to go back to it.

School is going well overall, I think.  Chemistry is confusing as all get out, but besides that, I feel like I'm doing well.  I'm still pretty happy with my major.  Although, if I were to get an extra B.S., I'm realizing I would totally get on in aerospace engineering.  The stars fascinate me.  Space fascinates me.  While I know my calling is nature and Earth, a part of me (maybe it's a part we all have, actually) draws me towards the sky and unknown.

Beyond that, I think things are good.  Things are interesting.

(Speaking of interesting, I keep running into this guy on campus I had a crush on in community college before I met Trev.  You wanna talk weird.  It's been like three years.  Why now?)

So yeah.

Gotta survive the liver biopsy tomorrow and everything will be okay.

Please send me positive vibes, my dear sweet readers.  It is very much appreciated.

~Meaghan